But...But...
Sometimes life just ain't fair, you know? Here's a story for you. Let me know what you think.As I think I've posted before, we have a 17-year-old girl I haven't given a blog-name yet who has been with us a few different weekends for respite. She's a pretty, rather shy girl, and she and I hit it off from the first night she was here and we sat up talking fairly late. She's got a fairly level head on her shoulders considering her shaky home life, and we've enjoyed having her around.
The last weekend she stayed with us was also the first weekend we had "Celeste" and "Jill", as well as one of the first weekends we had "Tammy" full time for her extended stay. The place was kind of a madhouse, and this girl seemed uncomfortable. Then "Jill" opened her gigantic, cavernous, gaping yap and said something crude and mean to her, which made her cry.
I immediately stepped into the breach and smoothed the ruffled feathers on both sides as well as I could. I let the girl know that this was not the sort of thing we allow here (and you can bet "Jill" heard the same in much stronger terms) . I thought we had things sorted out...and I suppose we did. But it apparently had to go just one step further.
The Wife spoke with the girl's social worker today, and apparently she was not as impressed with our house this time. Enough so that she told the social worker she didn't think they should send any more kids to our house. Ouch. But the main reason she gave, at least that I heard, was one we really didn't have control over. Yes, it was busy and louder than she's used to and she apparently didn't like it, but I didn't hear a special problem with that.
No, what really got her was a little incident that happened that weekend which is one of the things I would have liked to write about but for lack of time and energy. You see, that was the weekend that "Jill" and "Celeste" thought it would be just a fabulous idea for "Jill" to pierce "Celeste's" nose. This probably isn't one to rate on a par with "Josie" deciding to pierce her own tongue, but it's close enough for government work.
So the kid says to her social worker that they shouldn't send more kids over here, because it's too loud and busy, and there's kids piercing each other and stuff.
Sigh. So much for the old reputation.
posted by Dan @ 8:06 PM
4 Comments:
Ah yes...don't you know that you are supposed to have perfect control over every single thing?
I'm glad to see you blogging again regularly.
You win some you lose some and it sounds to me that the unhappy girl is a little upset that she no longer has the house to herself anymore when she is there. I know first hand how busy and loud your house can be but i can always find a quiet place to hide out.
They have this amazing little basment book nook that is perfect for an escape or two. And no matter how hard you try to be perfect there are going to be complaints made as i am sure your mom can attest to or maybe she got lucky..
You and the wife can only do so much and give so much to each kid...you do a good job and i think the social workers know that...Just add it to your list of things you need to be aware of..LOL
Teens are tough and do stuff like that on their own- what do cw's expect- you to sit in their room with them all the time?? argh
Jealousy is an amazing thing. One of our respite girls either loves it or hates it here depending on how much personal, one-on-one time she gets. I'm usually OK, but Hubby takes the brunt of her comments because he's in the same situation you are: a young girl being in the same house with an adult male. Recipe for disaster.
Because we have always been told to expect accusations, we try very hard to eliminate potential situations as well. With that, Hubby becomes aloof, then causing her to criticize him. You can't win!
Thankfully, her SW understands her pretty well and takes her complaints with a grain of salt. She knows B likes to stir things up (and she does it a great deal), so in that regard, we're hanging in there ... I think.
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