Other People's Kids

Dads Suck

We've got "Charlie" and "George" this weekend, besides "Josie", Mitch, Tasha and Willy. It's a madhouse, but for the moment we've got "George" passed out in the crib, "Charlie" wandering around the house being watched by yours truly, Mitch passed out next to me, Tasha and Willy passed out in the other room, "Josie" on good behavior because she really pushed our limits last night, and The Wife passed out downstairs after convincing "Charlie" that she was going out for a couple of hours, since she was up with "George" most of the night (as was I for part of it, having spent 3 hours or so with "George" sleeping on my chest while The Wife got at least a little sleep).

Almost instantly after The Wife retreated to the basement, "Charlie" fell while climbing into a chair and banged her head against the wall, hard enough to break the skin. Suddenly "Dad" had to be a nurse, and bandage and kiss and make it better. "Josie", as I mentioned before, is great with kids and was a good help in that emergency. Judging from how quickly she quieted after what was really a pretty hard hit, I clearly passed the test, but just as clearly I'm not her mom, and The Wife would have been a preferable triage consultant.

I'm now simply enduring an endless series of questions from "Charlie", about 3/4 of which consist of "What're you doin'?", trying to fit in a post between running into the other room to see what sort of mischief is happening, and listening for the baby monitor to announce that I have yet another direction in which to spread my attention.

I'm also paralyzed by the idea that I may have to change a diaper. Yes, I'm a disgusting wimp. But through a magical confluence of luck, skill, and sneakiness, I can only recall a single diaper change I was ever required to actually perform, and that was on my nephew nearly 20 years ago. I may be a little rusty, you think? The second may be this afternoon. Wish me luck. Heck, wish "George" luck. We'll both probably need it.

posted by Dan @ 12:25 PM