Since "Jill" left, it's AMAZING (!) how life has settled down. That girl is probably going to end up a politician, because while she was "in office", it was very hard to pin the general unrest and evil feeling in the house on her specifically. Yet, it's pretty much all gone at the same time as her. I'm sure that's just a coincidence, right?
When I say "evil feeling", I'm not just blowing smoke, and I'm not the only one who felt it. When we brought the girls to a regular dinner meeting with other foster parents in the area (aptly termed "share and support" meetings), the host foster mom commented on it. Something about the girls having a "bad vibe". Well, with "Jill" gone, "Celeste" suddenly seems like a much more normal--if troubled--kid. And she has problems that we can DEFINITELY help with, if we're given the time.
And there's the source of our current conundrum. When "Celeste" came here, it was with the idea that we were simply a transition place for her until she could move in with her bio dad. Apparently either nobody consulted "Celeste" on this, or else they didn't believe what she had to say. Because when we asked her about her feelings on the matter, she said she wouldn't live with her dad. She would either run away or commit suicide first. Too bad the kid has such a hard time expressing how she feels, eh?
Sooooooo...the real problem. There's the looming matter of school. She doesn't want to live with her dad, but she DOES want to go to the school in that town, about 20 miles away or something. She has friends there. Well, The Wife won't be driving her to school, especially when if she goes to school here, she could get picked up at the end of our driveway. And it's hard enough some days to get her up at noon. I shiver to think what she'd be like if you tried to wake her up in time to drive her to a bus pickup 10 miles away in time for the bus to get her to school.
There seems to be no plan B for this girl right now. Since we're now okay with her after the removal of the root problem that we had such a hard time dealing with, we're prepared to keep her here indefinitely. But today, her social worker is going to tell her that she'll have to go to school here if she's not living with her dad.
I don't know if I can be blamed for this one as well, but we'll find out. It's okay, I can take it. Plus, I think she's starting to be a little less mad at me about "Jill" leaving. She even joked with me a little the last couple of days. This could be fun after the initial badness.
I owe regular readers an apology. Over the last 1/2 year or more, I just haven't felt like posting much. Much of that time, it was because there was little to report. Lately, there's been way too much to report for me to have the time to digest and make sense of it in order to write coherently about it. Hopefully that will change soon.
"Jill" has now been removed from the equation. I've written a bit about her, but I'm pretty sure I haven't conveyed the full flavor of what it's like to have her in the house. Let's just say that my relationship with her climaxed on Saturday, when I was sent to pick her up from the county fair. She immediately went into her patented argument routine. I was tired, and without her knowledge it had already been decided due to other factors in her behavior that she would be leaving on Monday. I simply quietly reminded her that if she didn't come home, there would be no phone or internet privileges for awhile, and she should just come on home so we could get on with life. Keep in mind that we were in the middle of the county fair "Melanie" was with me as I was giving her a ride home after a visit, she was with a friend's family (that friend being "Tammy", who readers are somewhat familiar with, I guess):
"Jill" (about 100 decibels): "Don't tell me what the fuck to do!"
Me: Good lord, watch your mouth and tone it down!
"Jill": (about 110 decibels, the volume of a jet taking off): "DON'T TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK TO DO!"
Me: (turns around and starts walking to the Shariff's deputy to get a hand dealing with this teenage critter)
And she actually followed. Granted, she scowled the whole way home as was a complete pill for the rest of the day, but she actually shut up and did as asked. If I'd been doing my job as a journalist you'd know what a surprise that is.
Anyway, that incident made her parting "letter" almost anticlimactic. I never actually received this letter...I read it in our keylogger program...the one she references in the second portion, as a matter of fact. According to the log, the first portion was written about 20 minutes before the second portion. Here's the first:
hey, i know we have had our bad times but we also had alot of great times as well. i really think of you as my father and i hope you never forget me, your a great guy and im sorry for all of the shit i put you threw, i love you very much please dont ever forget that. the reason i did not say goodbye is because i did not wana start balling and i know you were mad at me. i really care about you. When you have a baby of your own i will be so glad because that child will be very happy and greatly taken care of. I really hope you can forgive all the stupid things i have said and done to hurt you adn your family. im gonna miss you soooooooo much that i will most likely be crieng when i leave because i will miss you so flippin much. the memories we have had will never fade in my mind and i hope that they never fade for u as well because no matter wheat you will always be a part of me and you are the best father a kid could ever ask for. dam im startin to tear up. i really miss you already. I love you dan!!! i know im a handful but i hope that deap down you will relize that i will always and i always have loved you like my dad. i hope you wright to me in juvie and i hope that someday we can see each other again. IM SOOOOO SORRY! im sorry i hurt you the way i did. you are sooo special to me. i really better go but please wright.
Love always your daughter
[Address information for detention center she went to]
[phone number where she expects to go from there]
Think she laid it on a bit thick? Apparently only to increase the effect of the final flourish 20 minutes later:
You know that letter that you are probably reading in your piece of shit type tracking fucking thing......forget it you fucking ass raper....you suck and well........bye i fucking hate you
Charmed, I'm sure.
So now you know the rest of the story. Or at least you maybe have an idea why I haven't been giving you much of the rest of the story. Right now, The Wife and I are so glad to "have our lives back" (The Wife's phrase, and an apropos one) that we're almost delirious. "Celeste" is almost a complete picnic after what we've been through.
See you on the flip side. Hopefully it won't be so long until the next post.
But I do still love my life.